Let me just say, before you read my list of things I don’t get, that there’s a purpose behind this list.  That purpose is something I say regularly.  Just think about what you’re buying and what you’re doing.  Your actions make a difference.  They say who you are, what you believe in and what you support.  They can help people, help the economy, help with saving resources, but they can also hurt these things as well.  Okay, so there’s a few in here just for fun too.

Luggage condoms. What exactly are we protecting the suitcase from?  If the plastic completely covered it, without wheel and handle holes, then it might make some sense.  It’s a good thing I didn’t have a paint ball gun or a big plate of spaghetti, because I would have needed to test this.  If you travel a lot and you’re worried about the condition of your luggage, it might be easier to pick up a set at the thrift store, then you don’t have to worry about the airline people destroying it.  As a matter of fact, you may want to consider one of these plastic condom outfits for yourself with the TSA “pat down” procedures now in place.

Wonder Bread shoes. I have a lot of crazy clothing, but shoes that look like a Wonder bread wrapper?  I know, to each his own…  Maybe there’s a bread maker employee who wears these to work as part of a uniform?  These shoes are made by Keds and have nothing to do with the bread company.  I get this more than I get the luggage condoms.  That’s another good reason to shop at thrift stores, there’s much to find under the category “random”.

Why any parent would buy this for their child? This t-shirt says, “1.  I want it.  2. You buy it for me.  3.  Any questions?”  I have questions.  If t-shirts are the modern day propaganda, is this what we want our kids to be saying?  I don’t want my kids growing up thinking they don’t have to work for anything, much less giving them everything they want.  I wanted to buy this shirt just to keep some kid from wearing it, although it is at the thrift store, so maybe the people shopping there see things a little differently?  Now I need to go back and see if it’s still in the rack.  When buying t-shirts for your kids, think about the message.  There’s lots of cute and funny ones available.  I hope the parents of this child are prepared to buy this kid a BMW when she turns 16…  

Why do people throw it in the trash when it belongs in the recycling bin… that’s right next to the trash can? C’mon, really?  I like to dumpster dive, but not because I want to pull all of the paper out of the trash that you threw away.  If I’m going to dive, I’m doing it to find treasures or things I can repurpose.  Being intentional about using our resources wisely seems to be a lot to ask of people sometimes.  If there’s a recycling bin close by, please use it.  In this case, the recycle bin is actually one step less than the trash can.  Maybe if I changed the icons on the cans to look like what I Photoshopped here, that might help?  Not sure…

Dog slipper… foot pad… cushion thingy? I’m not sure what this is, Siamese twin puppy slippers with curious plush dog heads attached?  If you’re sitting in a chair and had these (this) on your feet to warm them, what if you forget and get up to walk?  You better not have any sharp table edges of anything near by.  This is an accident waiting to happen, or by the looks of it, never used.  Alternative?  A warm pair of socks or a pair of slippers.

Where do all the leftover chips go? I like to eat at Mexican restaurants, but the ‘chip situation’ is something I often ponder.  The first bowl usually gets eaten, but it drives me nuts when they pick up the half full bowl to give you a new one.  Do they expire in 12.67 minutes?  Where do they go?  In the trash?  Chip heaven?  Are they recycled?  Do they feed them to a pen of pigs in the back?  Take only what you’re going to eat, tell them no to the new full bowl that will go to waste.  If you want more, ask for a half bowl.  So far, nobody has ever said no to me on that request.